Stolen Life

I sometimes find I'm drifting
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.

I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.

You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone,
I questionJust where I belong.

I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize,
investigateMy life I will confess.

For somewhere deeper,
there must beSome meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.

Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?

It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.

I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.

It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.

Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?

Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end,
will I find truth ...Or will I be perplexed?

Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?

Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.

My interaction with God..and Maa

I am not a hardcore religious, or spiritual person who follows daily rituals or does daily meditation or prayers , but at the same time i am not an atheist, i believe in God, his presence around every thing, every person.

I do visit temples, gurudwaras, majars, and I do have small temple with all the dieties at my home, once a while i do fasting and prayers....!

Since the age of 14 I have tried to find meanings to God & Life with the help of my mentor Da-Saheb, at Indore. I had choosen the option of worshiping God through prayers, rituals, praise Him through hymns and propitiate Him with offerings, sacrifice and gifts. All these has helped me a lot from the days of low confidence, and achieve something formidable in life.

Of late i have started accepting that Life’s definition of happiness and spirituality also keeps changing as we go along. It took me long to figure out that if it was to be a give and take relationship, wherein God gave me something only when I pleased Him, He couldn't really be God! How could God desire a conditional contract with human beings? And readied myself to face the repcurtions of any sort due to this change in belief.

Now my chosen way was easier to follow for me ... it was just to leave the things on its own, assuming god is there always, and he knows what is good from me, what is required to be done. I did the things which were right as per swadharma, I have decided to do duties honestly, fulfill responsibilities sincerely , honour obligations towards family, help needy people, giving back whatever is possible to the society as core foundation blocks of my life.

As per path chosen by me, I may not get closeness to god, i may not be ever able to understand, his nature, his creation, his laws ..But even if I am able to understand my self , and control my self and direct my actions with righteousness i will be able to achieve my life goal.

I seek God in everyday life as I go out to do my karma. For me, god is always inside me as well as always around me in the form of my parents,my kids, my family, my friends, my music, my writings, with who are real and they prevent me from falling in trap of my desires and materialistic ambitions and encourage me to reach to higher goals in life.

My interaction with god, which is rarely in temples or pilgrimage places ...but regularly in my car while driving back and forth between home and office on roads of Mumbai. or in lap of mother nature on endless roads or sea shores ..i feel that i always talk to god the very moment when i am alone.

For me god is formless, and nameless, i ask him any thing, everything and he responds to me instantly..in the same language i ask him.... he teaches me various things from being in control of my desires, controlling my thoughts, controlling anger, resting expectations from others, keeping control over anger, living a simple life.

People may interpret my discussion or prayer as nothing but a self talk of a mad person, who

questions himself and answer himself but thinks he is talking to god, be it...i am not bothered.

I am sure someday, I will meet God, not just feel the presence. But whatever and wherever, I hope God looks like ....my Maa.

My Teachers and Their Teachings

We always learn from others, either through direct one to one communication, or by observation or by reading their thoughts.I have some very distinct memories of last 30 years of my life, specific incidents which inspire me to be a better human being.

I am not sure whether I am covering 100% of important learnings of my life, but i am making an attempt to put them together without any order of significance or importance, each one are equally important and significant.

Swami Vivekananda : Strength is Life, Weakness is Death, identify your weakness and overcome them.

Sarla Kingrani (My Mother): Character, honesty and Integrity are first stepping stone of your journey towards success.

Ajay Mehta ( My best friend..my shadow) : Only thing you need in life is sincerity to your work, no work is big or small. Money you earn is incidental not the purpose of working...

Indranarayan Chandrawal ( Da- Saheb): More difficulties you face in early part of your life, stronger you become to face challenges in your life.Don’t look for excuse once you have made promise, always honour commitment you made even if it means loss of anything materialistic.

Javad Ahmed Siddiqui ( My teacher in engineering who transformed me forever)
Trust your dream, you have great potential, have believe in what you are doing, no matter what other tell you. Limitations are only imaginary.

S K Kingrani ( My Uncle): Respect hard work & labour of your employees, if you take good care of your them, they will take care of your challenges team will do anything for you

R K Sharma ( My friends father) Giving me dream of becoming an successful person, a business manager … “ If you fail to plan, you plan to fail”

B K Singh (My first Boss in TATA Motors): Respect your customer, understand them, spend time with them, understand their business model, they are your only GOD

R K Ghosh ( My boss for 5 years, my guru, my inspiration, my mentor): In most of the challenging situations of life sincere effort is more important & Valuable than intelligence or smartness

Don't hide any mistake...a mistake is only a mistake if you don't learn and grow from it. And if you do (your choice), how can it be a mistake? Because it's served to make you better/wiser/more excellent."....be genuine.

Ratan Tata : Even an introvert and humble person can achieve the top most position in life.....as well as be humble when you reach on top. In life ethics, reputation; values are more valuable than wealth you create.

Tushar Dave ( My Manager in Satyam): Whose unflinching faith in God and Never say die attitude with absolute simplicity and sincerity is foundation of my resilience in professional life, Learning's from Tushar were..."Never give up, you loose the deal the day you stop trying getting it. God always helps when you sincerely try"

Dhruva chandrie (My Manager for 4 years in Reliance, person who influenced me most as a professional): Importance of being focused and detail oriented in life. Organization pay managers for getting things done, not for developing relationships or friendships. Take my words .. He is Jack Welch in making

Hital Meswani ( My super boss in Reliance): Respect each individual and his knowledge, it is humany impossible to know every thing about anything in business...one should be genuinely interested in understanding brass tags.God lies in details and if anyone ignore details he is surely heading for disaster

Mukesh D Ambani : Think Big, Act Fast but Plan Micro ( key to success)

Anjaney Bhutada (my friend, philosopher and guide) : Success can be achieved with Simplicity and without hidden agenda, geniuness and true spirit of helping others help us in long term

Badi Maa (My conscience keeper) : Face any adversity with grace and unflinching trust in God.

Prabhakar Bisen ( My friend and Inspirtaion) : Leave small things for others, aim for Big in Life.

Sudip Narvekar (My friend and buddy) : Corporate positions are not a pre-condition for friendship.

A big thank you to all my Guru's . I am sure these learning's (some new, some reinforcements) are going to shape my life, my future, and my next generations.